Lovey dovey floppy crap.

I've been single for far too long. My last relationship ended a considerable amount of time ago. So recently, inspired by a friend of mine. I joined a dating site.

I have had literally no success from it. Roughly 10-15 women have viewed my profile, I've messaged a few to which I received no replies. I have 4 who want to meet me but obviously you can't find out who until you pay up which I'm not doing.

There are so many types of people on there which is good. The variety is endless, and as someone who likes to read the profiles rather than simply going off a picture, I have to say it's so irritating when someone simply puts 'ask me' or '...' or 'Yeah I'm not filling this in'

Why do some idiots simply write 'ask me'? Why? Why should I? I went to the effort of writing a wee bit, (obviously) to give people an idea of what I like/dislike and the sort of person I am. Maybe that's why I've had no success. Equally, I don't want to sit there having a conversation for it to die on it's arse three messages in because we've got nothing to talk about.

Put the effort in!

Also, headlines. I don't know whether it's just women, but they write such utter crap. Here's some examples and what I'd like to message them saying:

"Live life" - Oh please continue. You words of wisdom inspire me. You said something that every living person is doing right now subconsciously. In fact they don't get much choice. Stupid phrase.

"Is everyone on here crazy?" - Yes, this is actually a dating site for nutters. I'm sure it's not you just picking up the wrong people. It's all our fault with our crazy antics.

"Darling I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream" - What the fuck is that supposed to mean? I take it this is a stupid song lyric as I've seen it 3 times so far?

"." - Bring me a hose I'm so hot for this girl I need cooling down. Why? WHY PUT JUST A DOT? THAT IS NOTHING. ARE YOU NOTHING? NO.

"Princess" Oh get out of here with your stupid fantasies of your tall, dark-haired, handsome knight in shining armour coming in on a white stallion breaking the door down to save you. What is this, a fucking fairy-tale?

"What am I doing here?!" I don't know, fuck off.

"Idek" What the fuck is 'Idek' a knock-off IKEA? 

There's a few there, and some are worse than that.



You know what I've realised, I've been single for so long I can't imagine being with someone and having to put with the fancy crap that goes with it.

On that happy note,

Cheerio,

Stevie.